Living Hazzardously

Little pieces of our journey with Jesus

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Sign-us or sinus

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This week started well and ended in a trip to the doctor.

Finally I am the center of attention!

Jess has her broken wrist, Al had his Pneumonia and finally I get to have a major sinus infection…

When I get a sinus infection it’s not just a headache, it’s not just an aversion to light, it’s not just a runny nose… nope, for me a sinus infection is laying there moaning in pain, covering my eyes with two layers of towels to block all light from entering my eyes, its a nose so raw that I start to think I have no more skin left to dab at… 

Maybe I am just a big baby?

Lets measure my pain tolerance?

When Al smashed my ring finger with an eight pound maul, I did lay down and hold my hand exclaiming great pain but never swore or shed a tear, so maybe that’s just coincidence… 

When I got a sliver that went in one side of my finger and out the other, passing by the bone which deflected the trajectory of the sliver. I looked, I saw and I said “ wow, that’s a big one!”

Or perhaps the proof of me being a big baby is when I got carpal tunnel surgery on both hands and orthoscopic surgery on my knee, on the same day so my recovery time would overlap. But a week later I was in the BWCAW, and got covid…still had a decent time.

Ya, I’m a whiner I guess. But I sure don’t remember the  “sign-up for sinus”

I was doing the math today and calculating how much time I’ve been set back because of my shifting responsibilities as a caregiver and now? I’ve lost four days to a sinus infection, and that’s not even the time it takes to catch up. did you know my pigs don’t give an OINK about how I feel, I still need water and feed them every day. Do you also know the chicks don’t give a cluck about my responsibilities elsewhere, they still need clean water and lots of grains… Minus 20F simply adds to the challenges, I don’t get to “wait until its warmer out” I just dress like I live in Siberia and fill the water, break the ice and wrestle with doors that are frozen shut… it’s all part of the beauty of our life. 

All this to say “I wouldn’t trade this life for any other”. I am blessed and I am tired. My life is full and not boring. We are serving and finding value. Life is most complete when you have someone that depends on you, for something. Finding value in serving others is one of the greatest gifts God gives us. I don’t regret how little time I have to do “nothing”, because the fact is, I have plenty of time to do what I like to do. Life will continue to wane on, and I will become less able to provide, and serve others, perhaps I can fish more, visit more and talk to those in need, even if it’s  just a little bit more, each day. 

A sinus infection may slow me down for a season, and give me time to think about things I would normally not give a single “OINK” about. 

A broken wrist may help me appreciate the laundry chores that I normally take for granted, or finding satisfaction in cleaning the stove.

Pneumonia may give me a new appreciation and perspective for caregiving.

But God is the one that gives purpose, value and worth to life at every level. 

Find someone today that needs a little attention, a little help, a little care, be someone like Jesus today to someone that needs a bit of Jesus’ love. 

Enjoying the melting but missing the snowshoeing, Charlie

A walk of faith.

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Dear Father God, what can I do? What have I not done? 

Back in May 2024 Jess and I prayed, we prayed many days straight and heard one answer… “GO!” and that is what we have been doing, but somewhere along the way I can’t help but wonder if we have made a couple left turns, costing us money… costing us time? Don’t get me wrong, of all the crazy trips I have taken and all the crazy Ideas I have started, failed and succeeded at… Sam’s Place is bigger than all of them, probably bigger than all of them combined. 

As Jess and I start running low on our resources to  fund this adventure, I look around and think….

WHAT CAN I SELL? We have been open for over a month, we have one client… everything we read, everyone we talk to, everything we know says…. This is an urgent need… housing! So, where is everyone? We have rooms, we have employees, we have food…. We don’t have people… and my funds are getting thin, everything I projected is right on cue, everything is exactly as we planned, everything is ready… Is it actually a valuable need? Then where are the people? 

Last night a prayer went into the heavens from my mouth, this morning my prayer is “Lord, what else can I do? Show me the path! I will walk the path! Who do I talk to? What else can I do? I have not lost faith in this endeavor, we still believe this is the right thing to do. 

I think of the promise made to King David, about building the temple, and how that promise was filled through David’s son. Is this too like the temple? Am I to prepare a way for another to walk into completion? I’m ok with that as well, although I am tempted to stand on my balcony and say “LOOK AT ALL THE GREAT THINGS I HAVE DONE!” like Nebuchadnezzar did, am I to start walking on all fours and eat grass like an ox?  Am I to go into my inner room and pray? Or am I the one standing on the corner with long tassels from the corners of my robe, lifting my hands high and praying in a loud voice so all the people can see how religious I am? I hope that’s not what I become. 

We pray, in earnest, pleading to the Lord to fill our need, providing us enough to make it, to not lose our home that I built, but if that is what we need to do? Then at least we can become our own tenants… I am not worried about us, I have been put into bankruptcy twice, survived losing my retirement three times and digging out of a mountain of debt while being a single father of three boys, they can testify that I don’t quit easy… My bride is not nervous because she knows I will always provide and protect her, she is safe… I have built a successful HVAC business, I know how to survive, I guess I was just hoping it could be easy for once. 

What do we do when our plans don’t align with Gods, or… when our timing for the plans God has for us is faster than God’s timing?

Well, that’s simple, we pray, we listen, we trust God, every step of the way. And we do.

On this exceptionally warm Sunday morning, I thank the Lord that heating Sam’s Place hallways and rooms is so much cheaper today than last week… I give thanks in all situations, because God is and will always be the one driving the bus, I am simply a tour guide, talking about the places God is taking us. 

Stay safe on the lakes and on the trails, Charlie.

Truth or Trust Fail

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I saw a movie trailer the other day starring Kevin Bacon and  Amanda Seyfried. Kevin made a claim “You broke the rules, there are no more rules anymore” This really struck a chord in my life… On one hand, we need to build sound and safe parameters to our lives for our safety and the safety of those we love. As a man, we have been given the responsibility of the protection of our families. Protection? From what? Maybe the horrible scene playing out in the Carolinas? Maybe from the fires in Maui? Maybe we should be testing fire hydrants in Cali?

What areas of protection do you see lacking in your world? Do we provide protections for others? WHO IS OUR CHARGE OF PROTECTION?

As the cofounder of Sam’s Place, Jess and I talk alot about how we can provide protection, how we can keep our residents safe…  safe, safe from what? I think back to the old movies like “Predator”. How would I protect anyone from that? I’m not a superhero… Well, I’m not super concerned about that type of threat, but I am concerned about other threats that are more realistic. Fires, floods and cold weather are real concerns… Locked doors, cameras monitoring who is “coming and going” are just a couple ways I can address safety, or maybe it’s the new boilers, electrical panels and a new roof? 

These are all great ways to provide protection, but what about the threats that we cant see? You know, the threats from within the mind? A few years back I got the opportunity to learn a bit about schizophrenia… It’s a difficult disorder. Imagine not being able to determine truth, hearing voices, seeing people and not knowing what is real. How do I protect someone from that? How horrible is it to allow a person to go on believing things that are not real? I guess if it doesn’t matter what a person believes then they can just imagine the reality they want? NO! That’s evil! 

I could go deep and prove my point here but in the end, If you don’t believe that objective truth matters, you will believe whatever you want to believe, regardless of facts, truth, reality and reason. If that’s true for you, I hope someone is looking out for you and protecting you from the reality of objective truth.

Back to trust, trust is knowing the person you trust will always do what is best for you in the long run. Trust is about putting others ahead of you and valuing the good outcome for them over your own desires… Think of it like the instructions on an aircraft, putting the mask on those that cant help themselves first is how is wrong and puts everyone at a higher risk of death. Taking care of the caregiver is how you take care of both people. BUT THAT SEEMS SELFISH. Until you are helping that person later, after the crash…

But what do you do when things are “WRONG” ? What do you do when trust is broken? What do you do when the one that is supposed to put you first with the lifesaving oxygen mask puts it on themselves and never helps you with yours, or worse, they put on the mask because they are saving themselves? What if the men in the Titanic got into the lifeboats to help the women and children get in but then they just stayed in the boat and did not help the women and children… 

The Movies are filled with scenes about trust fails, like life, the breach of trust is difficult… it destroys relationships faster than any other situation… 

If the plane had one too few masks, or the Titanic had too few boats… Where do you suppose you would see Jesus? Behind the mask? In the boat? No, he would be high and lifted up on that cross for you. For me. 

I’m so glad to realize that after I put the mask on my boys, help Jess into the boat, and stand at the end of life’s journey, I will always have company… The Men that take their jobs serious and Jesus. They will all be standing at the rails, watching the ones they love floating away to safety. 

Trust is a life’s journey, yet we all fail sometimes. Charlie