Living Hazzardously

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Minnesota ice age.

April 11, 2026 by Charlie Leave a Comment

The snow drones on like a persistent and spoiled child throwing a temper tantrum in the Walmart check out aisle. “MOM!!!! I WANT….” You know the one, screaming, calling mom names and hitting anyone in reach, slamming products onto the floor and making a huge messy scene, all because mom said “NO”

Winter never seems to understand his presence is like nails on a chalk board. But who is the brat causing a disturbance? Me? You? Us? Them? Ya, it’s got to be them!! You and I would never have a hissy fit over an old man named Winter, or the not so distant cousin named “icy roads” WOULD WE?

So we complain about the snow and the cold, in the midst of a global warming catastrophe, we complain about the cold and snow. As if our complaining will change the course of time and produce a more pleasing outcome of warm sand beaches and sun drentched umbrella decorated cocktails….

A man in the bible named Job (biblical name Job is pronounced “Jobe”) talked about the cold descending from the north, most agree he would be talking about the post flood ice age that was brought on by atmospheric interferences of the Sun’s power to heat the earth… How silly to complain about the weather. 

This week I felt like Job of the bible. Except I’m not as righteous as he. I got news, my day was changed, life changing news actually, the kind of news that makes a person sit back and re-evaluate everything, reflect on goals and re-consider choices.  Then the weather hit, Easter weekend was ruined, I still had to cook up 2 large hams, all the potatoes and everything else to feed 8 at home and 12-15 at Sams Place. Now WE spend the day cooking so that the food can be stored and used in other ways. 10 pounds of taters, green bean casserole, cheesy taters and gravy, over a gallon of gravy, way over a gallon. 

Like a mortar round that was perfectly on target…. Then more thuds as mortars kept coming, situations, news sickness and distress… when will it stop! My knee needs to be replaced and today the pain is a five or six…. My foot is killing me, I hope the Dr can figure out what thats about. My Fibro is flaring and the whole body hurts.

Everything bad just kept hitting me on que, not giving a minute to breath… Trouble at Sams place was next… It just kept coming! I looked out the window, I need to fix the chicken water thats frozen… I cant even see the coop because of the heavy snow fall…. the snow!

I won’t share all the news we got that day nor will I share all our struggles, at least not today… maybe in a future blog. Pushed to my limit, the day never showed mercy and attacked me!! Spoiled and relentless, the day never ended. One thing after another. The kids are not coming! Quickly change plans! I don’t get to see my grands or my boys or my DIL’s… and then it was there… I finally found it, the end of my rope.

A swift proclamation, I heard my mouth utter “GOD HAS DESERTED ME!”

Deserted me?… GOD?? What did I just say? 

My mind flashed back to a man that questioned God, his name is Job.

JOB 1:13-19. Job lost everything! sons, daughters, livestock, servants… the only thing he did not loose? one employee, the man that brought the news of Job loosing EVERTHING HE HAD! (sumarized)

Job 1:20 Then Job got up, tore his robe, and shaved his head; then he fell to the ground and worshiped. 21 He said,

“Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
And naked I shall return there.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.
Blessed be the name of the Lord.”

22 Despite all this, Job did not sin, nor did he blame God.

How is it possible, I blame the Lord? And just like that, I sinned. 

It’s a humbling moment to see just how weak I am and how quickly I blamed God for my lack of faith… I immediately realized my failure, I turned to my wife and said I was wrong to think this and I’m sorry for being weak. In the stillness of my heart I asked the Lord for his forgiveness, and he granted it to me. 

I’m glad I live in the time of grace. I’m glad that God is not unforgiving, I am glad that when I sin, God makes a way of reconciliation and forgiveness. 

Praise the Lord that he has set me free and He is always my KING!

In sack cloth and ashes, C.

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Filed Under: Christian Living, Faith, Sam's Place, Truth Tagged With: anxiety, God, trust god

The hands of an old man

March 22, 2026 by Charlie

Pedaling fast, “stunt riding” on my English 3-speed, what a dork I was… Back to the days of bike riding all day and never venturing beyond the sound of my mothers whistle… I was maybe 9 or 10.  I remember the hands of a man named John, a dear, sweet man, who lived on the block just south of me. 

He owned a “Lawn-Boy” mower, you know the one. It has a front wheel set oddly back from the front of the machine, on only one side. His back yard was fenced in the standard 4 foot tall chain link and attached to a single car garage. The magic of lawn care was flowing from this garage like the “yellow brick road leading to the emerald city” or perhaps a faithful geyser in yellowstone. With all the mystical contraptions to be utilized for the sole purpose of detailed landscaping.  He maintained the perfect lawn in North Minneapolis, at that time. 

As I steered my bicycle into the storm drain, obviously within sight of this magical garage, I felt the thump, and it was done. The front wheel wedged into the straight slots that diagonally crossed the grate, gaps that seemed to be perfectly spaced, trapping the front tire. An evil plot of its maker to collect little adventurous boys’ front tires… The Storm grates sole purpose was to give a man a reason to help the little boy escape the evil peril.

As he strolled the short block to where I was stuck and helped me whenever I got my front wheel trapped… a sewer grate… I think he knew, no, I KNOW he knew it was a trick to gain attention. 

My father came home one day to see me stuck. The first time it happened was actually an accident… dad whooped me hard that day and yelled at me… but the man with the lawn mower was kind, you could see patience and concern after he saw the rage my father had, a contrast so great, I had a longing to experience that kindness again, even if I needed to manipulate my world.  I had no idea a man could be kind… 

 I admit, I did this on purpose a few times to get attention from this pillar of a man that guided my life. Kindness was real, it wasn’t just found in story books. …. 

This man I knew only as John showed patience and concern over the many years of my childhood. I would hang out with him, watch him sharpen his mower blades, help him with little things like sweeping the sidewalk. His mower Blades seemed to always be dull and in need of a quick tune up and rebalancing. The magnificent lawn and a perfectly maintained mower were his only jobs. He had a wife, but I can no longer picture what her appearance was, I just remember she would appear from time to time dressed in her Sunday clothes on the way to church.

I remember the hands, big, strong, wrinkled and spotted. As he lumbered over to where I had again gotten my bicycle stuck, his arms extended and with no effort, removed the bike wheel as if it were as easy as taking a breath. 

Today I went online to order supplies for a job and I was reminded of this man! I looked down at the keyboard setting on my desk and I saw John’s hands. This time they were attached to my arms. Although there are no kids with front wheels stuck in the storm sewer on the corner of 35th & Sheridan in north Minneapolis, I couldn’t understand why he left his hands behind and why in the world are they attached to my arms???

I may not have a small child in my neighborhood, I may not have a pristine yard with a spotlessly clean lawnmower that reads “LAWN-BOY” across the front… What I do have is the little boy’s memories and the old man’s hands. In some ways, these two people have again met and somehow defied the laws of space and time to see the need to help a struggling little boy…

I serve these “boys”, some older than me.. Sam’s Place, (SIGH) some of  these guys have never seen a kind man with strong, wrinkled hands… they may have only felt the calloused back hand from fathers. A hand that steals. A hand that beats down another. Maybe they have only known the harsh words of a father screaming at them? Words of how worthless they are? Perhaps they have never known the kindness of a loving father (or a man named John)? Perhaps they reject the kindness of a man trying to help, because experience tells them nobody helps out of kindness but rather out of selfish gain??? 

Maybe they need help with the “bicycle and storm grate” of their youth? 

These old man’s hands typing on the computer are not mine, they belong to the old man named John! Wrinkles and lines, spots and calluses. The years have handed me these hands and I hope to pass them on to the next man named… Well I don’t know his name, probably never will.  

Hands passed down are now together and apart…

Yesterday I felt like I was only thirty, the day before it seemed like I was 20, and the day before that, I was a little boy looking at an old man’s hands… Now the old man’s hands are mine. 

May God Bless you this day with the hands you need, C.

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Filed Under: Christian Living, Faith, hope, PTSD, Sam's Place, Truth Tagged With: anxiety, Christian Living, faith, God, trust god

Where are “Joshua and Caleb?”

March 7, 2026 by Charlie

When men stand up and be mentors to other men.

So often I see women’s groups flourish at studying the bible, helping each other out and being social… but men? I haven’t been in a men’s group for over ten years, not because I am not interested but rather because men’s groups always seem to be the same story… If your church has a men’s group, it’s likely serving widows (which is great), a basketball game on Thursdays (which is healthy) or a men’s breakfast that happens every few months (nothing wrong with this either). Or maybe I am missing something?

I had a man tell me his story about trying to start a men’s group that digs deep and studies the word of God. He was met with negativity, complicated requirements and very little encouragement from leadership… Shortly after his failed attempt, the same guys that explained how the idea was “stupid” started to develop a “men’s group”. This group did “guy stuff” shooting, fishing, sports… He watched a group of guys put together a “fun day” with a short devotional at the end, but was never asked to participate at any level… Have you ever experienced this? I did some digging and sadly I discovered this is very common.  

What is it about men? Are the only things we care about is the latest sports score? The largest walleye? And how the “buffoon” made them laugh in the last episode of “the Simpsons’ or Family Guy” or “Al Bundy insults everyone” … Is that who men have become now? 

I called some area churches a while back, asked one simple question: “Do you have any men’s groups at your church?” The answer was no, universally every church I was able to connect with and every man I asked was a simple no, and some answers sounded like they had never even heard of a men’s group to study the bible. 

December 20, 2025, I dove into a topic that is important to me, “Exploring Masculine Identity Struggles”… I cant give you all the details, but lets just say, being a man these days is definitely not “PC”… The common issues are 

  • Persistent feelings of pretending
  • Guessing rather than confident decisions
  • Anxiety about being inadequate
  • Craving order but never finding it
  • Difficulty in meeting standards for fear of criticism
  • Not being supported in emotional reactions causing shut down

In short, men need men to find healthy masculine pathways, feedback that supports growth and accountability of balance between assertiveness and softness… 

Fast forward to today, I have asked so many guys… “Would you be interested in helping us out at Sams Place by mentoring or helping lead a bible study?” Where are the men that the bible talks about with “IRON SHARPENS IRON” Where are the men of God, the strong, valiant and fierce men of God? 

Where are “Joshua and Caleb”? The man who led the Israelites across the Jordan into the promised land as leaders who serve the people and represent a model of faith, military leadership, and covenant obedience…. 

When men step out, back and down from the roles God has appointed to  them to do, things go wrong. 

Joshua and Caleb who returned and reported after 40 days of scouting: The land is good and favorable. The other ten came back and reported about the giants and there was no way to win? They had “defeated themselves” even before they started.

Are we men of God like Caleb & Joshua or the other ten, fearful of failure… that is entirely up to you. I suggest we stand up today and say “HERE AM I, SEND ME”.

We are never too messed up (like Sampson), Poor of speech (like Moses), foolish (like a talking DONKEY) or criminal (like the murderous King David) to be used by our God…

May the peace that supasses all understanding be with you today, C.

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Filed Under: Christian Living, Faith, Sam's Place, Truth Tagged With: Christian Living, faith, God, step dad, trust god

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