Living Hazzardously

Little pieces of our journey with Jesus

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Fixing that leaking tire in your life. 

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I was out mowing the other day and I remembered just how therapeutic it can be to mow the trails. I was stressed about not having the time to mow the yard for three or four weeks. But, Today I finally mowed the trails for the first time this year… actually, I never even mowed them last year either. WHY? Well, my mower broke down two years ago and I finally gave in and asked the neighbor to fix it, “I just don’t have the time to fix the mower”.

How ridiculous is that statement? I don’t have time to fix the mower but magically I would have time to mow? If I had just missed one mowing cycle, I could dedicate that time to fixing the mower, but instead I just missed mowing the entire season. 

How often do we do this in life? How often do I put off doing something until everything is right to do that thing? I paid someone to fix my mower because I just don’t have the energy to take on one more “MR. fix it” problem, but mowing takes longer, mowing takes many hours to accomplish, but mowing is therapeutic, and sometimes I just don’t have enough “problem solving” energy to resolve the broken boat motor or the lawn mower. But if they were working, I would easily find time to mow or fish… fishing… that sounds nice. I just need time to fix that boat motor. 

How many times do we say the same thing about our relationships with friends? With our spouse? With our pastor? With our-self? Our lives get so cluttered with daily living that sometimes we just don’t have time to fix the things we tolerate. Like the man that fills the tire of his truck every day, he knows it’s leaking and rather than taking 3 minutes to put a plug into the tire to stop the leak, he takes one minute everyday for months to just fill it with more air until he has time to fix the tire… 

I had a tire in my life that had a leak, it drove me insane, but over the last 450 days (fixing Sam’s Place) I have had to prioritize my time more than any other time in my life, I never missed an opportunity to restructure my time, to prioritize projects and fix leaking tires. Now I am to the point that I can start to breath a bit, but I feel guilty for taking a day off to work at home, or an evening to relax, or a date night with my gal… we have both been burning the candle at both ends… it’s now time to catch up on a bit of maintenance at home. Our relationships need some attention, and we are now able to start inserting that relationship time back into our lives. I thank God for his direction and for sustaining us this past year. 

This summer we are taking a few trips to see our kids and grand babies. It’s hard to allow myself to enjoy some well deserved time off after not even having a free weekend for so long, but I seem to settle in quickly enough to enjoy the few days we are able to squeeze out so far. 

One of our biggest obstacles in Bigfork is lack of transportation, public transportation. Our clients have needs that can only be filled by trips to Grand Rapids, so now we are using our little four seater car to transport folks to rapids and back. It’s a mess when we get back home and some days it’s smelly, but we have no choice! 

We have had multiple meetings, attended forums and made countless phone calls with public transportation operators, private transport options, D.O.T. … NOTHING! We can get some limited Medical rides if we plan it for two weeks… Recently We had one client miss a Dr. appointment in Duluth because our car was already in use that day with another client’s needs. So, we just need to get a van asap, do you have a van you are willing to donate? We have had offers from some folks to buy their van.  The truth is, we can’t afford to buy a van, so we just need to “keep filling the leaking tire” until we can somehow resolve the issue. We honestly loved the offer from one person who offered a van for really cheap…

I just can’t afford to buy a van at a really good price and then spend countless hours fixing the van. We just need that van that works, asap. 

So I appeal to you today. If you are reading this Blog: please go to our website and donate to get a van, or… maybe you have a van you would like to donate? Or maybe you would like to match some of the other matching funds to our grants? There will be more information about this in the future.. We need matching funds to fulfill our grant requirements for the following projects: ADA accessible (ramp, elevator)? Painting, exterior upgrades? Fencing, garden and pavilion? Updating the kitchen? Air Conditioning and ventilation (it’s horrible hot in there after that storm we had and even the day before.)?

Where ever you want to help, we have a need! 

Visit our website or join us on Facebook

https://www.samsplacenorth.com/general-5

https://www.facebook.com/p/Sams-Place-61559249289857

Asalways, God Bless

C.

Why I am always the perfect one!

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I remember a man who assumed he knew what I was saying, but he didn’t. In fact he believed my intentions were very bad. He felt attacked, personally attacked and never once did he ask qualifying questions until the end of the conversation. But, I was done! I regained control of the conversation and tried to make it very clear that he was assuming the wrong intent… By then, the conversation went from a civil dialogue to outright hostility.

I’ve noticed that my communication style seems to spawn this reaction too often… yet I honestly believe I assume the best of a person until they have proven the opposite. So, I guess I am the perfect one!

Why is it this way? When I talk to customers, I seem to do very well. I communicate clearly, informatively, and completely. I seldom have a hostile situation with customers, strangers and business… BUT, personal life is very different many times. I can only assume that the way I talk to those in the “inner” circle is different? Or do we make assumptions in the way we receive information from our closer friends? 

This got me thinking. Do we find grace as people get closer or do we increase our expectations of being talked to in a particular manner? Do we automatically determine the closer we are the more offensive a person should be to us? 

“HOW DARE YOU SPEAK PLAINLY TO ME! I WILL NOW ASSUME YOU ARE MY ENEMY, AND FURTHERMORE, YOU ARE NOW TRYING TO START A FIGHT WITH ME… FROM NOW ON, YOU WILL BE TALKING TO ME WITH HIDDEN MEANINGS AND EVERYTHING YOU SAY IS NOW A HORRIBLE ATTACK ON MY VERY EXISTENCE”

What an odd scenario, I must find a way to talk to those I care about in a way that is not offensive yet plainly spoken when I see a stronghold on those I care for… Jesus said something about this:

Mark 6:4 Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor except in his hometown and among his own relatives and in his own household.”

Could Jesus define this phenomena? I believe he wrote this for a specific reason, he wanted us to know that those who know you the best, tolerate you the least… How odd! You prove for years you have good intentions, always and still, and yet your intent is now assumed to be that of an enemy. 

Don’t get me wrong, I too judge others intentions by the words. Yet as for myself, I am perfect, so I judge my words by my intentions.….. My intentions are always measured by myself, your intentions are also measured by me.. I can perfectly measure my intentions every time, so obviously that makes us experts on measuring everyone else’s intentions as well… 

My message for you today is to start assuming the best in others and when you start to feel like someone close is “attacking” or perhaps “criticizing” you, stop, take a good look, seek first to understand and then to be understood.

James 1:19 You know this, my beloved brothers and sisters. Now everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger;

Proverbs 18:13 One who gives an answer before he hears,
It is foolishness and shame to him.

Generally, ask this before you assume and become angered “This person I am talking to, are they my friend, do I trust they care about me? Are they invested in my life? Am I trying to just pick a fight because I don’t like what they are saying? Am I just being a snowflake? And lastly…. Is the person I am talking to from Generation X, because if they are, they probably don’t do the following:

  • Talking in circles means repeating the same point without making progress or getting to the core issue.
  • Beating around the bush means avoiding the main topic or being evasive, often due to discomfort or fear of directness. 

And they likely communicate within the following parameters:

  • Concise and clear: They get to the point efficiently and avoid unnecessary words or details.
  • Direct: They address the issue at hand directly and honestly.
  • Forthright: They express their ideas or needs openly and candidly.
  • Frank: They are open and honest in their communication.
  • To the point: They focus on the essential information rather than tangents. 

In essence, these individuals value efficiency, clarity, and directness in their communication. 

Please don’t become offended, but rather value frankness and assume the best of intentions. The person you are talking to is likely very passionate and cares deeply, otherwise, they won’t waste time talking to you.

And if you are like me, stop being so “efficient” these are people not computer programs you are talking to… FEELINGS MATTER, at least to them. 

As always, God Bless, C.

DAD’S day

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When is a good dad great?

On fathers day, I wanted to look at and understand the complexities of a good father vs a great father. 

A good father loves

A great father loves

A good father says “I love you”

A great father says “I love you”

A good father provides

A great father provides

A good father supports

A great father supports

A good father is present

A great father is present

A good father is a positive role model

A great father is a positive role model

A good father is a friend to his kids

A great father is a great friend to his kids

All in all, there are many principles to be followed in these statements, and none of them are bad, they are all levels of good fathering…

Dr Google says :

The key difference [between a good and great father] lies in the level of active engagement and the depth of the relationship with their children. 

The world is measured by the world, and basically the difference is found in the “degree of goodness” a father has for his kids. 

“A good father is good to his kids and a great father is gooder to his kids”

But the bible sees it very differently… The bible says “fathers” with no distinction between “good” and “great”. So what does it mean to be a father in the bible? Here are a few key illustrations from scripture:

raising them in the Lord’s instruction

 guiding children towards a right path

 righteous and wise, highlighting the impact of a father’s example

 leading with reverence for God

You can clearly see the Bible has turned the relationship of

“father / child”

to

“father/God, child/God, father/child”

and does not talk about the child and father without God, a great father is a three way relationship putting God at the center and father/child on each side.

“father/GOD/child”

If you want to be a good father, be good to your kids, if you want to be a great father, be gooder to your kids but if you want to be the father you are called to be… put God in that relationship first and always point back to God. 

“Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake?

If you think you are a good father, God says you are actually evil (by comparison or actually evil by human standards, it matters not). “evil” and you still make good choices for your kids…

A godly father should be our goal, not a good father and not a great father. We should be friendly, not friends. We should be models, not peers. We should be God focused, not person focused. Take back the role of father today and serve your children well, teach them in the ways of the Lord first. 

May God richly bless your sacrificial service to your family today as you discover God’s sacrificial service to you. 

Special side note: There are a group of men that give extra, not all are “GOOD” but remember the “step fathers” who make a decision every day to be a father to a child that usually rejects that man daily, remember those men that “step in” as a father…

C